“
Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.
“
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it.
“
Work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do. Play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do.
“
Man - a creature made at the end of the week’s work when God was tired.
“
Thunder is good, thunder is impressive but it is lightning that does the work.
“
Man was made at the end of the week’s work when God was tired.
“
Work is a necessary evil to be avoided.
“
Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn’t.
“
Truth is mighty and will prevail. There is nothing wrong with this, except that it ain’t so.
“
Why shouldn’t truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense.
“
When in doubt tell the truth.
“
Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities Truth isn’t.
“
Truth is the most valuable thing we have. Let us economize it.
“
It’s no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.
“
If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
“
I have made it a rule never to smoke more that one cigar at a time.
“
A round man cannot be expected to fit in a square hole right away. He must have time to modify his shape.
“
Substitute ’damn’ every time you’re inclined to write ’very’ your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.
“
The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.
“
Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.